[Tea With Alice] James Hoare – MasculinityWeepsCast

James Hoare – MasculinityWeepsCast

20/05/2019 by Alice Fraser

Web player: http://podplayer.net/?id=71204243
Episode: http://s3-ap-southeast-2.amazonaws.com/alicepodcast/236_james_hoare_-_masculinityweepscast.mp3

James Hoare on Masculinity and Grief

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Listen Date: 2019-06-15


  • Talking about grief and mourning is quite a change for this podcast; and especially after the last few weeks of talking to Australian comedians. But somehow what James Hoare had to say about this didn’t really grip me or resonate with me. But that of course may be because you have to pass through grieving the loss of a parent or very close loved one before you can understand what somebody else has to say about it.
  • This did spark a train of thought that my family has it much better on pure finances when it comes to funereal arrangements then do the stories coming out of the United States. When one of us dies, at least we don’t have to worry about the cost of a coffin or burial plot, since it’s cremate, leave the ashes in a river, and done. Of course, not being under the spell of rapacious priests helps as well.
  • That train of thought went on to the next, tangential, station of “Signaling in the United States in family occasions in general goes too far, what with brides getting infuriated when somebody else wears white, or has the same hairdo, or so on. Basically, the threshold for what it takes to upstage a bride seems very low. (This follows from reading the justnomil subreddit, where the wedding fury seems to be the one area where I don’t sympathise with the posters in a flood of otherwise enjoyable bitching about relatives.)
  • Perhaps this is self-delusion, but I think that in the last couple of years I’ve been making it a point to meet my older relatives more, feeling that I may not get the chance as they age and come closer to mortality. Does that mean that I’ve pre-emptively made it past the denial stage of grief? We will see.


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